Who's the Boss? A Bible Study on Authority for Parents

This Bible study is a version of the devotional Helping Your Child Understand Authority designed for parents, teachers, children's church workers, and anyone who works with children who desires a better understanding of what God has to say about authority. I feel that this study is revelant to all Christians, whether you are parents or not. Submission to authority is a serious topic; be willing to let the Holy Spirit search your heart for wrong attitudes and mindsets.

Before you start, you will need:

• A prayerful attitude: ask the Lord for insight and understanding of His Word
• Gather the following tools:
  1. Bible in one or two translations
  2. Dictionary (Webster's 1828 or Bible Dictionary recommended) and/or concordance with Hebrew and Greek lexicon
  3. Pen and notebook to record your thoughts
  4. Copy of this Bible study (permission is granted to print out for personal use)
• If you do the Bible study online, after clicking on a Bible verse or definition hyper link, just click on "Back" to return to your place in the study.

Lesson 1: What is Authority?
Lesson 2: Who's the Boss?
Lesson 3: Who Else is Boss?
Lesson 4: What Does God Think of Extreme Disrespect and Worse?
Lesson 5: What is Discipline?
Lesson 6: How Should Children Treat Their Parents?
Scripture References and Definitions

Lesson 1: What is authority?

1. Record who Romans 13:1 states authority is derived from?
   
   
   
2. Define authority.
   
   
   
3. Read Exodus 20:12. What does this commandment require of children?
   
   
   
4. Define honor.
   
   
   
5. Let us further examine what the Law has to say about a child's attitudes and actions toward their parents. Read Exodus 21:15. According to the Law, what was the prescribed punishment for a child striking a parent?
   
   
   
6. Read Exodus 21:17. According to the Law, what was the prescribed punishment for a child cursing his father or mother?
   
   
   
7. Define to curse.
   
   
   
8. Read Proverbs 23:22. What is a child commanded to do?

   a.

   b.

   
   
   
9. Define despise and contempt.
   
   
   

We must examine our own hearts. What concept of authority are we modeling? Do we respectfully submit to the authorities in our lives: police, IRS, pastor, employer, husband (for women)? If we are irreverent in our actions and words toward the authorities placed over us by God himself then our children will only do the same. Ask the Lord to search your heart and reveal any rebellion in your own life before moving on to the next lesson; confess your sin, repent and move on.

Lesson 2: Who's the Boss?

Read 1 Corinthians 11:3.

1. What do you think "head" means?
   
   
2. Who is the head of every man?
   
   
3. Who is the head of every woman?
   
   
4. Who is the head of Jesus?
   
   
5. What does a boss do?
   
   
6. So who is the boss of all?
   
   
7. Define head (a Bible dictionary or concordance will be necessary to adequately define this term).
   
   
   

Read Ephesians 6:1-3.

1. What does obey mean?
   
   
2. Who are children to obey? Why?
   
   
3. Who does the Bible say is a child's boss?
   
   
4. What are some of the things parents will have to do as their children's boss?
   
   
5. What will happen when children honor their parents?
   
   

Lesson 3: Who Else is Boss?

Read Romans 13:1-7.

1. (Read verse 1 again) Who is to be in subjection to the governing authorities?
   
   
2. What do you think "subjection" means?
   
   
3. What are some examples of "governing authorities"?
   
   
4. (Read verse 2 again) Who established these authorities?
   
   
5. (Read verse 3 again) When we resist, or don't obey, these authorities, who are we really resisting?
   
   
6. (Read verse 3 again) Who should be afraid of rulers?
   
   
7. Are you ever afraid of your boss, pastor or the police? Why do you think you are afraid of them?
   
   
8. What do you have to do to not be afraid of authority?
   
   
9. (Read verses 4-5 again) What might happen if you disobey an authority?
   
   
10. Read verses 6-7 again; Fill in the blank: Rulers are servants of ________.
    
    

Lesson 4: What Does God Think of Extreme Disrespect and Worse?

A long time ago, before Jesus was born, died and was resurrected, a man names Moses was given some laws by God Himself. There were some laws written for children. We can read about these laws in the book of Exodus in the Old Testament. Back then, when children were bad, sometimes the punishments were very harsh.

Read Exodus 21:15.

1. What did this Law say would happen to someone who hit his father or mother?
   
   
2. After learning about this Law, what do you think about a child who hits his father or mother?
   
   
3. Do you think God dislikes this kind of behavior? Why?
   
   

Read Exodus 21:17.

1. What did this law say would happen to someone who cursed his father or mother?
   
   
2. What do you think "to curse" means?
   
   
3. After learning about this law, what do you think about a child who curses his father or mother?
   
   
4. Why do you think God dislikes this kind of behavior?
   
   

We don't kill children for hitting or swearing at their parents now, but God considers this the worst kind of behavior a child can show toward his/her parents and is to be taken very seriously.

Lesson 5: What is Discipline?

Read Proverbs 13:24 and Proverbs 22:15.

1. What do these verses say should happen to a child who breaks the rules, disobeys or isn't respectful?
   
   
2. What does God expect a loving parent to do with a child who is foolish and disobedient?
   
   
3. What will the rod of discipline do for a child?
   
   
4. Who made parents boss over children?
   
   
5. Who will then punish a child when they do not obey or do what they are told?
   
   

Read Proverbs 19:18, Proverbs 23:13 and Proverbs 4:1.

1. What does discipline mean?
   
   
2. What are some ways that godly parents discipline their children?
   
   
3. Who gave parents the job of teaching and training their children?
   
   
4. If parents are doing their job when they discipline their children, how then should children respond?
   
   
5. Do you always accept correction?
   
   

Lesson 6: How Should Children Treat Their Parents?

Read Exodus 20:12.

1. What does "honor" mean?
   
   
2. In what ways should a child show honor to a parent?
   
   
3. What behaviors do not show honor to parents?
   
   

Read Proverbs 6:20.

1. What do you think "observe the commandment of your father" means?
   
   
2. What are some of the commandments you as a parent have created in your home?
   
   
3. Why do you think you want your children to do these things? Might be a good time to examine rules and make sure they are not oppressive, but character-building and protective.
   
   
4. What are some of the teachings your spouse has been attempting to teach your children?
   
   
5. If you think about it, will these teachings help your children be better people when they are grown? Will they help your children get along with others? Are they Biblically-based?
   
   
6. How then should children treat the commandments of their father and the teachings of their mother?
   
   

I challenge all rule-makers to pray over their list of rules. Make sure they are not motivated by irritation or other selfish motives. Seek the Lord for what are truly important issues to focus on in your home. Stick with those issues before attempting to work on others. Let the Spirit of God lead you in teaching and training your children.

Scripture References and Definitions

Romans 13:1 - "Every person is to be in subjection to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those which exist are established by God."(NASB)

authority - legal power, or a right to command or to act; as the authority of parents over children. Power; rule; sway.

Exodus 20:12 - "Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be prolonged in the land which the Lord your God gives you." (NASB)

honor - to revere; to respect; to treat with deference and submission, and perform relative duties to.

Exodus 21:15 - "He who strikes his father or his mother shall surely be put to death." (NASB)

Exodus 21:17 - "He who curses his father or his mother shall surely be put to death." (NASB)

to curse - to utter a wish of evil against one; to imprecate evil upon; to call for mischief or injury to fall upon; to injure; to subject to evil; to vex, harrass or torment with great calamities. Vines Complete Expository Dictionary defines the term "to curse" as "make little or comptemptible".

Proverbs 23:22 - "Listen to your father who begot you, and do not despise your mother when she is old." (NASB)

despise - to scorn; to disdain; to have the lowest opinion of.

contempt - the act of despising; the act of viewing or considering and treating as mean, vile and worthless; disdain.

1 Corinthians 11:3 - "But I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of a woman, and God is the head of Christ." (NASB)

head- a chief; a principal person; a leader; a commander; one who has the first rank or place, and to whom others are subordinate.

Scripture taken from the NEW AMERICAN STANDARD BIBLE®, Copyright© 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission.

Definitions are from the Noah Webster's 1828 American Dictionary of the English Language.

©Copyright 2006 by ADHD of the Christian Kind. Permission granted to print out for personal use only. Copyright must remain with all materials.

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