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It's amazing to me how God uses the time I spend to write this column and opens my eyes to things, increasing my awareness of my son. This column has been a real blessing to write. I came to this today feeling like I have nothing to say. But as I was writing that first paragraph, explaining how discouraging it is for me to have to take medication to deal with life, the Lord said to me, "How do you think your son feels?"

Hmmmmmmmm, now there's a thought-provoking question. Quite humbling too. My son gets very upset when he has to stop what he's doing to come and take his medicine. And what is it I'm always telling him? "Son, get yourself under control. What time is it? Oh, it's time for you to take your Ritalin" Oh my. Am I really saying that to him? In one breath? No wonder he hates to take it. He must feel like even more of a freak than I do. I'm really embarrassed and wounded that I am hurting my child like this. Well, I'm not going to wallow in self-pity. I'm going to take this situation, view it as a learning experience and go on - with His help.

Dear Lord, thank you. Thank you for opening my eyes to the way my son must be feeling. Thank you for putting it on a personal level, so that I could truly understand. Father, I'm so sorry for the way I've unknowingly been hurting my son, for taking a difficult situation for him and making it even worse. Please grant me wisdom and compassion to deal with him in a more sensitive manner. Help me to think, before things just fly out of my mouth. Please Lord, take this situation and bless it that by my sharing it may help others not to hurt their children as I have hurt my son. And also turn this around to end up glorifying you by changing me and helping me to grow in you and in my relationship with my son, that in our relationship growing stronger, he might become closer still to you also. Please help me to convey my awakening to my son in a way that he will be able to understand and find forgiveness for me, and in a way that by confessing what I have been doing, explaining that You Father, are the one who opened my eyes to this, he will see you as the loving, compassionate and embracing Father that you are.

Thank you Father, that in all of the children you have to look after, that I, an insignificant small one, don't get lost in the crowd. You truly do know me by name! Thank you!

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