Take Away the ADHD?

by Katrina Milligan
May 10, 1997

This week is JB's birthday! I can't believe my guy is going to be 12! Seems like only yesterday that it was Mother's Day and I was in tears because I wasn't a mommy yet (I went into labor at 11pm Mother's Day night, can you believe it? Must have been all those tears!). But now, 12 years later I couldn't be prouder than I was the day he was born! He is a beautiful child!

How many of you have had people shake their heads and say things like, "I just don't know how you do it?" Or just tell you how mortified they would be if they're child did something like that (in the meantime, while they're bragging about their "perfect" child , he/she is the one who has been terrorizing yours, and caused your child to react in a, well, more obvious way).

You know what? I feel kinda bad for those people. As I ponder the last 12 years, I can honestly say that if I had it to do all over again, but could remove the ADHD part of JB, I wouldn't do it. That may sound really strange at first, we all think, "Goodness, if only he didn't have to struggle with this . . ." I know I've found myself thinking that, along with, "If only I didn't have to struggle with this," which I feel very guilty about. But lately, I've had a change of heart. I realize, if I were to take the ADHD out of JB, I'm afraid some of the very things I greatly admire about him would go with it, or at least diminish to some degree.

I'm also thinking about a comment I made to a friend of mine, about a totally different subject, but that I think may apply here too, I told him, "If you didn't experience the valleys, how could you ever appreciate the mountain top splendors?" You have to have one to understand the other. I think this applies in our everyday experiences with our kids, too. My same child who is an emotional roller coaster, he's either up or down, who has no comprehension that there will be consequences for his actions, is the same child who can sit for hours, design, and build an elaborate something or other! He has great artistic ability that blows me away, and let me tell you all, he definitely didn't inherit it from me - or his Dad for that matter. I wonder sometimes, if he were "normal" would I take his gifts for granted? Would I assume that he would find his own niche? I'm sure I wouldn't get the joy I get when he is excelling at something. Most likely I wouldn't home school, and I would have missed the most joyful parenting event I can imagine!

So, I'd like to dedicate this week's column to JB, my son, whom I love with all my heart. I'm so proud of him, he is a terrific kid! I thank God for the privilege of having him for a son!

I love you JB!
Mom

This column originally appeared in the Unit Study Coffee Table.

©Copyright 2006 by ADHD of the Christian Kind.